Friday, April 4, 2014

Things I will never apologize for (and you shouldn't either)

In my last 'serious' post I wrote about how social media has sucked the life out of quality photography. That post is still making waves in the social media sphere. A lot of people were with me on this, and got the overall message. Some said I was stuck in the past and that I should 'adapt or die'. A few of them went even further and said I should apologize for writing that post.

That got me thinking.
Here's a list of things I (and you as well) should never apologize for. Ever!

So sit back, relax, buckle up and hold on! This ride is going to get bumpy!


1. I will never apologize for being inexperienced  
We all have to start somewhere. (see next step). Ignorance is acceptable. Staying it, is stupid. Educate yourself and if you can and dare, others as well. I love film photography for example. It's just my thing. It feels good doing it. But I know that I have a long way to go. I'm dedicated to a life long learning experience. I'm cool with that.

2. I will never apologize for asking for help

Don't be afraid or proud to ask your friends, and/or industry peers for help. We are all in this together. You would be amazed how many of them will write you back and offer to help you out or give you their opinion. Straight up. No strings attached. If someone is not reacting to your emails, leave them in your trail of dust. But remember it's not a one way street. If somebody is asking you for help, help them out to the best of your abilities.

3. I will never apologize for who I am or for what I believe in
Everybody is entitled to their opinions and beliefs. Let nobody take that away from you. If it doesn't stroke with their beliefs and opinions then tough luck. Staying quiet will eventually wear you down. Put it out there.

4. I will never apologize for sticking to my values
If people can't handle what I consider to be important values then that's too bad. It's their problem. Not mine.

5. I will never apologize for calling BS on someone
If nobody is willing to call it, I'll call it. I don't have a problem with that. Do you? Then that's too bad. You see, if we all stare at each other and whisper what we want to say behind closed doors, then nothing gets done.

6. I will never apologize for being passionate, obsessive and enthusiastic about photography
The passion for photography is what drives me hard these days. I've never been so passionate about anything else before in my life. It's a weird thing. But I'm loving every minute of it.

7. I will never apologize for loosing myself in research
I love research and can be absorbed by it rather quickly. For days on end. SO what? 

8. I will never apologize for being overly critical
Take it with a grain of salt internet. Are you ready to stir the pot? Then great. That's how we move forward. If not, the defriend/uncircle/unfollow button is at the top. Click it. Thanks! Glad we sorted that out.

9. I will never apologize for telling an unpopular truth
Truth is and can be a very complex thing. It is usually not all rosy either. Deal with it princes and listen up. Speaking the truth is never a sin. Never be afraid to speak the truth. Point out flaws, lies and injustices. On the other hand be afraid of the ones that never speak up. They're the ones that are afraid of conflict. They just want to be liked by everybody. Poor little things.

10. I will never apologize for breaking a rule that isn't a rule
Be a rule breaker! It's exciting. Don't be afraid to break unwritten/secret rules either (e.g. in my case the list of things I had to adhere to on the internet. Pushed on to me by the big, popular and all mighty mob called 'social influencers'). The internet has no boundaries people, and very little laws. Never let anyone tell you what to do. Push the 'accepted' boundaries outward and then turn it up to 11. Sit back and see what happens.

11. I will never apologize for who I am
I might come on as strong, harsh and very blunt sometimes, but I won't apologize for it. It's not my problem. It is you that is making a problem out of it. By you, I mean the people that claim to be holier than Jesus on the internet. Tip: If people seem like they never do anything wrong, don't trust them. It's all PR marketing! I rather be ME – with my shortcomings – and be proud of them, than insincerely fake my way through life to make a buck or two here and there.

12. I will never apologize for telling you how I feel, for speaking my mind, standing up for something I believe in or expressing myself
Honesty makes those 'perfect' people (see previous point) uncomfortable. Good! Let's – for instance – make some more people uncomfortable with this post. Yes I mean you, you internet celebs that claim to be leading perfect lives covered with happiness and positivity. Rrrrrrright. Let's get things straight here. I will be the first to claim my life isn't perfect. And I am proud of it! Be human. Have your flaws.

13. I will never apologize for my art

I will never EVER apologize for the art I am making. That would beat all purpose out of making art. All art could and maybe should be a narrative on social opinions, beliefs and issues. Search for that angle where your art makes a difference.

14. I will never apologize for being a landscape photographer
I hear so many people say 'I'm just a landscape photographer'. Never be afraid to tell people what you do! If all else fails, practice your introduction in front of your mirror until it is a natural thing to say. 'Hi my name is Oliver and I am an artist specializing in traditional black and white landscape photography.' Own it!

15. I will never apologize for my portfolio

It might not be to everyone's taste, but that's no reason to apologize for it. If you start a portfolio review with apologizing for it, your a dead duck. Or you apologize for the quality a certain photo lacks, then why is it in your portfolio in the first place?

16. I will never apologize for disagreeing with someone or something
– If we would all like the same stuff, we would live in a very boring world (and we would all drive grey cars). I have no problem in calling you out if need be. That might not be the most popular way to handle a disagreement, but I'm European. What can I say. We hate wasting time sugarcoating stuff and fluffing it up to make sure we don't offend anyone. Don't be such a fragile flower.  Grow some thorns. 

17. I will never apologize for getting something off my chest
The longer you keep issues on the inside, the more those same issues will eat away at your soul. Get it off your chest. Even if it offends people (see previous). Too bad. Deal with it. Leave a comment below.

18. I will never apologize for dreaming big

Have goals in mind and stick to them. Have 5-10 little goals you accomplish every year. All those little goals add up in the end. But also, have a big end goal in mind and spend every free minute of your time working to get there.

19. I will never apologize for making a decision from the heart

That's where your truth lives. Use it. Use it in your art! Don't think about it, feel it!

20. I will never apologize for saying NO to something

I will never be too proud to say no to something or someone. If you do, you'll feel good afterwards.

21. I will never apologize for setting high quality standards
 
"Turn up the good, turn down the suck!" (Bonus points for whoever knows what Canadian classic movie this comes from). Crank that button hard!

22. I will never apologize for thinking something was possible nor will I apologize for failing
Fail. Fail often. Fail hard! Crash and burn. Lessons learned. Done deal. Move on. Grow! Think of your career as a house of cards. Let it crash down once in a while. Step back and evaluate. Then pick your strong cards up first and rebuild your foundation. Continue building and learning until you have to let it crash down again. It is the normal circle of being an artist.

23. I will never apologize for complaining about something

If everyone is assuming somebody is going to say something, nobody will ever say anything. So file that complaint! Put it out there. So others can learn from your remarks. 

24. I will never apologize for my online presence
Face it, these days we are all our own marketing brand. Not everybody is fluent in speaking the language of the intrawebs. And not everyone is a marketeer. That is OK. Be yourself and it will sort itself out in the end. For example, not everyone will like my brand or the ideas and beliefs I have about photography. And that's OK too. If everybody did like who I am, then I was definitely doing something wrong.

25. I will never apologize for sometimes swearing like a sailor
Yes I know. I swear. I swear a lot. Cursing is something I will do when I f*cking feel like it. It ads a little spice to the conversation. Damnit. I couldn't live without them. (unless there's little kids around)

26. I will never apologize for my obsession for perfection

I like to get things as perfect as possible and it will usually take longer then expected. Get it right! First time around. No need to apologize for that. Sometimes you only get one chance. Nail it! It's better than proudly show mediocre presented work any day of the week.

27. I will never apologize for what I need nor my pricing

Everybody deserves to be compensated for what they do. Research your competitors. And when someone asks about your pricing, speak up and confidently state your price. If you are not in their price range, then find clients that fit in your price range. Not the other way around. You can't please everybody. Unless they are friends. Work with your friends to get them the best deal possible.

28. I will never apologize for being selfish

I will let you know when I need a dose of me-time.

29. I will never apologize for leaving home to chase my dreams

This one is pretty obvious and it is the truth. We have so many more opportunities here in Canada then back home, in Belgium. I have zero regrets for moving. Was it hard to leave friends and family behind? Sure it was. Was it worth it? Heck yeah! 

30. I will never apologize for my taste (or lack of)
Hey I like gas guzzling V8 muscle cars and NASCAR races on Sundays! So what?


Sure people will judge me (again) for writing this post. But I won't apologize for it. I am myself on this blog. And I am sharing what I think is important. I believe there is an epidemic in this world today for apologizing for everything we do. I wonder why. Because we don't want to offend people? Is that it? Nothing is less attractive then a person who says sorry all the time. Own it!

"It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them." – P. G. Wodehouse

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